Today marks one of the most awesome days I’ve ever had the fortune of experiencing.  No, I didn’t win the lottery.  No, the Jets aren’t finally coming home to Winnipeg.  No, we haven’t even found a planet with new life on it.  Why then, is this day so amazing?  Because MSNBC is reporting that China has outlawed Tibetan monks from reincarnating without permission.

If you have not begun either laughing (or crying) uncontrollably, I suggest you re-read the previous sentence again.  I’ll wait for you.

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Ok, well I’m not waiting that long for you.  I still have no alarm clock, so my sleep is still all messed up, which in turn has diminished my patience to that of an army colonel with a bad case of hemmorhoids.

Onward!

According to Yahoo, a man has been brought out of a six-year-long vegetative state simply by electrodes that doctor’s placed in his brain.  Not only is he awake in the most basic of senses in that his eyes are open and he is responding to stimuli, but he can talk with family, watch movies, and even play cards.
I get depressed sometimes when I look at the world around me; all I see are people who are killing each other for not good reason, people stealing from each other for no other reason than greed, and I see people who are just terrible to each other in every other way imaginable.  Though, when I read this story, I had a huge grin on my face because it means that there truly are people out there who just want to make life better for others.

The company, Medtronic, developed the implant originally for Parkinson’s patients, but when tested on this coma patient, they found that if they very slightly upped the voltage over time, it would stimulate the right parts of the brain enough to bring him out of a vegetative state.  I know that critics are going to argue “Oh, well if they’re really doing this for the good of the people, they should offer it for free, or not make so much profit,” but unfortunately for those critics, they use those same economic principals (read: capitalism) when they meet with their manager for their performance review/raise, or when they’re searching for a new job.   Companies charge more, and they (usually) pay their employees more as a result.

At any rate, back to the original point of this article.   I think it’s fucking amazing that we have enough knowledge that we can attach wires to someone’s brain and bring them back to consciousness.  I mean, I want you to honestly think about that for a second.  50 years ago, hysteria was considered a form of mental incapacity.  20 years ago, brain surgery was still in it’s infant form of what it is today.  And today, we’re zapping people’s brains with electricity to bring them back to life.

Goddammit, I want a Frankenstein of my own.

In yet another wonderful display of American justice, the Supreme Court of the United States voted Thursday, June 28th, by a narrow margin of 5-4, that a 96-year-old antitrust precedent was null and void, ushering a new age of price fixing. As if the consumer doesn’t get the short end of the stick every time they are emptying their wallets, pockets, and credit cards at the cash register already, now corporations are actually being allowed to work with each other to bring about higher minimum prices for which ever products they see fit?

Unbelievable.

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